Spiritual Baby Steps

"Doing" spirituality in the real world

Archive for the tag “Debbie Ford”

Inside Out Job

I’ve been listening to derek rydall talk about giving away what you want. In his course, Emergineering, he explains that everything in our lives happens through us… not to us, as we’ve been taught to believe. It’s an interesting concept. I’m a big fan of Debbie Ford, whose focus is on shadow work. One of the main premises of shadow work is that we hold within us every emotion, every characteristic, everything. It’s a little wild… and it’s definitely different from everything we’re normally taught. This idea that Derek talks about is that happiness… or anything else you want in your life… is an inside job. In order to have more of something in your life… instead of going out and getting it… or relying on some external source to give it to you… you must go inside yourself and cultivate it from within.

Derek offers an exercise that was helpful to me. Imagine yourself having just won the lottery. You close your eyes and really feel into the state of financial abundance. You have millions of dollars at your disposal and millions in the bank.  If you really get into the exercise, you can have fun imagining all that you’ll buy, how your life will change, how safe and secure it feels to be in this state of abundance.  Once you open your eyes, the “reality” is that you did not win the lottery and you do not have millions at your disposal or in the bank. But you created, just through your mind, the experience of abundance – without actually having it. The feeling of abundance is within us… it is not dependent on anything outside of ourselves in order to feel it, nor is it guaranteed to be present because of any specific external cue. Look at the plethora of professional athletes who make millions and are broke and do not feel safe or secure.
We are taught that in order to feel differently, we must go out in the world and get stuff, learn stuff, meet the right people and get the right breaks. The reality that we are not taught, however, is that our internal state is what dictates our external circumstances. If you are experiencing lack in your life, you – on some level- are holding a mentality of lack. Now at first you might resist this statement, but how many of you have complained about not having enough money in the past week? If you’re like most people, then thinking, feeling or commenting on not having enough is a regular occurrence in your daily life. In fact, it’s amazing that I have any money at all considering how common and easy it is to complain about what I don’t have, what’s not working, etc.

Here’s an activity for you… Take one area of your life where you feel lack. Whether it’s money, respect, love… whatever stands out to you as something you really want and feel like you don’t have. For the next week, notice all the ways that you embody that lack. When you notice it, make an active attempt to shift your internal state. How can you be more loving and emanate love to yourself and others? How can you be more respectful? How can you be more giving (of money, time or resources) so that you emanate a state of wealth and abundance? I know for myself this feels like a major challenge. To consider that everything I have and how I feel every minute of every day is all a direct mirror of my internal state is… well… overwhelming and challenging for me to grasp and accept. Yet, at the same time, there is a part of me that resonates when I hear this concept and really believes this is true. No judgment. Simply notice and se if you are able to shift your internal state on a regular basis toward more of what you want rather than what you don’t want.

Consciousness always clothes itself in form. ~Derek Rydall

Enjoy your week and let me know how it goes! Love and laughter!  ~Rashel

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As Above, So Below…

What if everything in our lives is a reflection of our own current state? I know, right… scary! I can’t seem to get my mind of this train of thought recently. I’m tired (refer to earlier post… I’m tired!) I’m feeling disconnected from friends… I’m overwhelmed with work stuff… and home stuff… and all the other things I’ve signed up for stuff!  Sometimes I feel like I want to stop trying… but then I realize… it’s not that I want to stop trying… I just want to be really good at everything I do and I want it to feel like I’m not trying so hard to make it all work.

If my outer life is a reflection of my current state… then my current state includes exhaustion… struggle… and discomfort, but it also includes happiness, joy and laughter. In fact, I’m a pretty glass-half-full kind of person, but even with my optimism, I find myself overwhelmed… and quite often, I might add. It’s not that I want or expect life to be easy… (well, maybe I want that, but I don’t expect it)… it’s just that I’m surprised at how difficult it is considering how optimistic I am and how much I enjoy life. I’m a nice person… I’m kind to others… I work hard… I think positively… I laugh often… I’m open to life… I find humor in most situations. I guess there’s a part of me that feels like… Jeez – I get it – I’m doing it –  let the good times roll, already! But I digress…

So back to this notion that whatever is showing up in my life is a reflection of my inner state. Well… there’s a part of me that just finds that disturbing! Is it just me? Is it really possible that everything that shows up is a reflection? There is a part of me that resists… remember how they used to tell you in school – if it’s always or never – it’s probably false? Then again, there’s a part of me that thinks it’s possible.  I know there are issues I don’t want to deal with, and they often get pushed down and ignored. Even though those issues get pushed down, they probably still  influence my reality. So, maybe some of the issues that present in my life are reflections of unconscious thoughts or things that I don’t want to deal with. Hmmmmm….

Action step… if you dare! Pay attention to the areas in your life that bug you… and think about why. What is it about that person or situation that upsets you? Now the fun part… think about ways that you might be exhibiting this trait. I know it sounds crazy… but it’s scary how often, if you’re really honest, you can see aspects of yourself in all manner of behaviors. I’ll give you a quick example from my life. I was really irritated with someone because I felt like they were not giving me enough respect and appreciation. At first I couldn’t imagine how this could be a reflection, because I feel like I’m very conscientious about being respectful and offering praise and recognition. When I pressed myself further and thought about where in my life I was withholding respect and appreciation… It dawned on me that I wasn’t doing a very good job of respecting and appreciating myself!  And yet, here I was expecting the other person to respect and appreciate me!  Ahhh… the irony!

The other part of this exercise is to pay attention to someone who you think is amazing, inspiring or fabulous in some way or another. What specific traits do you admire about that person? Then take time to acknowledge that you hold those very traits within yourself. If you did not have them, you wouldn’t notice them in others… it goes for both the positive and less positive aspects!

Something to ponder. Love and laughter to you!  ~Rashel

 

Opportunities… everywhere!

One thing I’m realizing as I meander through this thing called life… there sure are a lot of opportunities for growth! My family and I went away this weekend. On our trip, we visited Calaveras Big Trees state park. It was very cool. When we started on the hike to see the trees, and we purchased the guide to tell us what, specifically, we were looking at – my daughter started to push back. Not much on school these days, and fully noting that not only is it Summer… but we are on vacation for crying out loud – she stated boldly to the group that she would NOT be learning anything on this fun walk we were taking. Apparently to her… learning is a task to be avoided.

Well, I kinda know how she feels. Learning can definitely seem like a chore. Except when it’s not, of course! We had a great time walking through the Big Trees… and we learned a few things in the process. Quite the opposite of a painful lecture, it was quite fun and enjoyable.

I’m starting to believe that life is funny about learning and growth. I think we make it much more difficult than it needs to be. Sit in a room. Study the facts. Memorize the basics. How much more impactful the tangible experience of life! But this is how we learn that learning should go. We are offered opportunity to learn and grow day-in and day-out — learn this new approach to dieting… learn this ancient relaxation technique… learn this… learn that… learn it all online without ever leaving your house! I will confess that I am a serious learning and growth advocate. I love to learn new things. I am constantly buying and signing up for programs that teach this that and the other new program, technique or process to grow, evolve and gain higher consciousness and healing.

But I keep coming back to the fact that learning is not knowing… and knowing is not being. When I consider my daily interactions, I realize that there are a multitude of opportunities to learn and grow right in front of my eyes. Instead of searching for the magic formula for healing – I could be actively processing what is right in front of me. According to Debbie Ford‘s shadow work, everything that comes into our awareness is a mirror of ourselves. WOW… talk about opportunity for growth! That’s like… you just totally pushed my buttons… what does that tell me about myself? Instead of focusing on your issues (and I’m not saying you don’t have any!), my opportunity is to push away the other and look squarely at what my mirror is telling me about myself. If you’re in my experience, you’re mirroring something for me… so thank you!!!

I invite you… just for today… to open yourself up to life lessons. What is life trying to teach you today… whether it is the opportunity to experience the majesty of Big Trees – or the chance to see how someone pushing your buttons tells you more about yourself than you ever wanted to know… invite it all in… just for today!

And I wish you many opportunities for learning and growth!! Don’t forget to pack your sense of humor for the trip!

Love and laughter… Rashel

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